serenity

I find it hard to live a life of serenity. I want my inner universe to feel something like this:


Often, however, I feel quite a bit more like this:


I feel bad about this, because Jesus' words on the subject of worrying bear the ring of a man approaching a state of profound irritation with our human density, even as he aims to inform us how much we are loved.

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life? And why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you--you of little faith?
--Matthew 6:25-30

Seriously, that's the same tone of voice I find myself using when attempting to convince the 5-year-old that eating her lunch would be a verrrrry good idea if she wants to hit legal weight in her car seat before age 10.

I think I have things to worry about. I'd like a job. I'm concerned about our church's youth program. I'm worried about my daughter's tummy issues.

In the grand scheme of things, however, I am profoundly, profoundly blessed.

I live in a nice, warm house. I have a wonderful husband who earns a good living and lets me dork around with my history stuff without concern for our finances. My daughter is kind, beautiful and a genius (says the completely unbiased source). :-) I have good, true friends, a loving family and a subscription to my favorite soccer magazine.

In short, in my case, at least, Jesus is well within his rights to be sounding a bit irritated.

I've noticed that several Facebook acquaintances have inaugurated a month of thanksgiving, posting something each day for which they are thankful. While my "thankful Thursday" practice is a helpful ongoing reminder, I'm going to make the rest of this month a thankful-every-day. The more I am focused on my blessings, the less room there is for worry. Please feel very welcome to share your thoughts of thanks!

Today's item (in addition to those above): I am thankful for my daughter's friends, one of whom is over right now. And I'm thankful that the kid has great taste -- the friend is a lovely little girl with a nice family.